I think it is a completely empowering statement to say "I'm like totally gorgeous." Well I am, and I don't mean that in a vagina-gazing, hairy-legged feminist kind of way. Come on guys, you'd have to be insane to pass up an opportunity to mate with lovely moi.

This is me lovingly torturing (in a completely non-fetish way) my housemate's cat, Daniel-San. Note: I am good with animals. This tenderness extends to human babies as well. If you were to procreate with me, I would be sure to change diapers in a timely fashion as well as supply all baby needs.

Look how devoted I am to Peter Tork! I will show the same devotion to my Co-Mater (provided you show the required worship of me). In fact, I will hang up posters of you on my bedroom wall that are bigger than this picture of Peter from a calendar.